IF AGE IS JUST A NUMBER, CAN I LIE ABOUT MY AGE ON A DATING APP?

 

I think I might know what you are thinking, and part of me agrees. People really should not begin relationships with lies. Usually the lies taint relationships rather irrevocably. Moreover is one not capitulating to ageism to fudge on this basic truth? But with new research and scientific thinking, the concept of “biological age” may be more of a reliable indicator than “chronological age”. If people are busy “swiping left” based solely on a number, which I have done countless times, does that not skew one’s search? Maybe some of these 75 plus year old men I shoot down are fitter, healthier, and sexier than those youngsters in their 60’s that I ponder over.  

Every time I open Tinder, Zoosk, Match, etc., I remind myself to not overreach, but stay within my “I could get him” level. Why waste time and emotional energy communicating with someone with who there will, most likely, never be a connection? But if I want this playing field to be fair and accurate, doesn’t lying about my age give me the “handicap”, as it were, to level the playing field? After all, often, but not always, men are looking for younger women, or at least they are frequently accused of doing so. This is merely a fact I cannot even get angry at, men want what they want. Often these wants are more like biological imperatives that are half hidden in the unconscious mind. And, women are capable of this wanting of younger mates as well. I am just not going to argue with any of it. But given all this, how do I accurately portray myself to the “I could get him” crowd? And who might that crowd be?

There is a concept, which has been around for a while, about chronological age versus biological age. Chronological age is just what it sounds like, the number of years one has been on this planet, a number I strive to forget on a daily basis. Biological age sounds much more appealing, but what is it, exactly?

According to https://www.healthline.com/health/chronological-ageing: “The basic idea behind biological aging is that aging occurs as you gradually accumulate damage to various cells and tissues in the body. The actual number comes down to different biological and physiological development factors”. Some of these include: chronological age; genetics (for example, how quickly your body’s antioxidant defenses kick in); lifestyle and nutrition (overeating can cause aging to accelerate); and diseases and other conditions. Using these guidelines along with various mathematical models, medical professionals can figure out what age your body “acts” like it is.”

I first learned of biological age years ago from Dr. Oz. There is an online test you can take that goes into detail about nutrition, lifestyle, body fat, mental health and other aspects of personal health, to determine your biological, or “Real Age”. The last time I took the test I was apparently only 59 and ½ (I am 68), although I have to admit I fudged a little on the amount of belly fat I have (I plugged in the amount of belly fat I thought I would have after I finished losing weight (that is almost legit, right?).  At the end of the day, I decided my “dating age” would be 63, as I figured there was no way I would be able to pass for 59 and 1/2.

Staving off aging and death has always been an interest to humans, think Ponce De Leon and The Fountain of Youth. My continued google searching on the subject brought up interesting information. Derek Beres wrote an article for www.bigthink.com entitled “Youthful thinking Can Slow-Even Reverse-Aging, Research Suggests”. Beres referenced a 1979 experiment by Ellen Langer, a Harvard psychology professor, which found that the manner in which each of the subjects in her experiment thought about time influenced the metabolic processes in their bodies. For one week, a group of “elderly men” essentially lived in a time capsule, a retreat center that had been tricked up to reflect 1959. They were told to live as if it were 20 years prior. Studying the men after a week in their cozy retreat, Langer found that the men looked younger, and showed improvement in memory, vision, hearing, and physical strength. Perhaps this means that the money I have put aside for my medically necessary facelift (ha ha) can be used for buying a cute little RV.

There is interesting information on the role of exercise in reversing aging. An article by the Mayo Clinic (“Mayo Clinic discovers high-intensity aerobic training can reverse aging processes in adults”), says that high intensity aerobic exercise “…can reverse some cellular aspects of aging. The take away is that “supervised” high intensity training reaps benefits metabolically and “at the molecular level”. Continuing on, the article describes “science stuff” that would be remiss of me to try to explain. However, there is one clear caveat. If one reads what is reported in “Cell Metabolism” (a scientific journal referenced in the Mayo Clinic article): the upper limit of the amount of exercise has not been established, and, at a certain point becomes unhealthy.

 

Another “age reversal remedy” floating around out there is “hyperbaric oxygen therapy”, also known as HBOT. According to MedicalNewsToday.com, HBOT is a treatment that originated in 1662 and “involves breathing almost pure oxygen in a special room or small chamber”. “In the 1940’s, HBOT became standard treatment for military divers in the US”, as it treats the decompression sickness that sometimes occurs after diving. Currently, the FDA approves HBOT for an additional 13 medical conditions (hyperbaricmedicalsolutions.com).

 

According to Dr. Shai Efrati, Director of the Sagol Center for Hyperbaric Medicine and Research in Israel, clinical studies conducted by his team demonstrate that through the use of HBOT  “…the regeneration of brain tissue and other important capabilities, is indeed possible” (as reported in “thevillageshealth.com).  In “aging-us.com” we learn that “Hyperbaric oxygen therapy increases telomere length and decreases immunosenescence in isolated blood cells”. Mind you, this is a very recent study, published on 11/18/20, and called a “prospective trial”. However, not one to be put off by the newness of all this, I discovered that I could purchase an HBOT for home use for pennies under 4K.  If only I could trade in my car for an HBOT chamber, having to walk everywhere would further boost the effects of my HBOT machine!

 

My favorite thing to do is to ever so slightly live in a fantasy world. Truth be told, over all else, this keeps me young, in my humble opinion. My brain is sending young messages to my body. Without even knowing it, apparently for years I have been trying to approximate the results of the Langer study. In my mind I am a 9 year old galloping around on a horse, whizzing down hills on a bike, and exploring scary looking places. So maybe next I will buy a banana bike with pink tassels, although I don’t know if I would have the social courage to ride it in public. The only other drawback to my plan is being unable to subsist on my 9 year old diet, Almond Joy bars and Peanut M and M’s.

Oh, and, I had a date with the first man to whom I lied about my age. I wanted to use the date as an experiment for revealing my age, but then again did not want to ruin things on the first date. What a terrible quandary! Overall the date went remarkably well. He told me his age was not accurately represented on Tinder as he just had a birthday two days prior to our date, thus making him a year older. Well bless his honest little heart; little did he know he is 4 years younger than me and that I was the biggest liar of the two of us. But I thought this was the perfect opportunity to tell him that I also lied about my age. He did not blink an eye, nor ask for my real age, earning thousands of points for gentlemanly behavior. So I guess I maybe got away with it, for now anyway. We shall see. I can tell you that a second date has not been mentioned..